Good news, team! After years of laboring under the oppressive thumb of entitled boomers and sad, slow-moving slackers, we, the millennials in this organization, have assumed control. Don’t worry. Nobody has been made uncomfortable, if that’s what you’re worried about. But there are going to be some changes around here. We thought you’d like to hear about them.
As you know, our demographic doesn’t really hierarchies. So we intend to run this company as a unified Team that agrees about everything. In addition:
Effective immediately everyone in the organization is a vice president. New hires will begin at the senior executive director level, and after a period of two weeks will immediately be promoted to vice president also. (But individuals who are upset about the waiting period can totally just skip it.)
Next, everybody will start making a lot more money immediately. We’re looking into this because it appears to have some financial implications, but we’re pretty determined to level out the income inequality around here. The pool of cash we intend to spread around will come from the salaries of the really expensive old people who were always flaunting their power and expertise. Those days are over!
Speaking of that, from this time forth nobody can tell anybody what to do if it upsets his flow or hurts his feelings. People can suggest things to each other, of course, but “bossy-pants” behavior will no longer be tolerated.
Effective immediately, curating your Facebook page (FB, -0.36%), going on Instagram or Snapchat, tweeting, or any other personal social media sharing will now be considered working.
Everyone is now free to get things right the second time.
There will be no penalty for having your earbuds in. Nor do people have the right to roll their eyes when other people are doing some necessary texting, even in meetings.
Speaking of meetings, they start when they start, all right? People have stuff to do and sometimes arrive when they end up getting somewhere, okay?
From now on, the response to “thank you” will be “no problem,” not the antiquated “you’re welcome.” Additionally, the response to every situation, no matter how imperfect, will be “perfect.”
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About the Author: Lalanii Wilson-Jones, MBA is a dynamic business leader based in Dallas, Texas who owns & operates multiple companies across several industries. Her range of talents and experience makes her an ideal candidate for strong economic partnerships all over the world, a great mentor and a great source of information that can change the mechanics of any sized company.
About the Firm: At Mogul247, we wish for our clients to be well-informed before partnering or partaking in any of our firm’s services. We hope your experience will be better once you know who we are, have more realistic ideals and goals about working with us, as well as understand what we are focused on doing for you and our community. If there are any other questions or concerns you may be having, please contact her assistant Jacqueline at (972) 707-0294